Amidst the hustle-bustle of this life, when we don’t get time to breathe, with the lineup of work plunging onto even that fraction of free second, our Moments of Realizations are lost and escaped.
We might create the cover of hump-sized egos but the reality will never fade its way through. Our work places are not relaxed zones giving room for realizations & revelations….we need to pull back, take time off and sit back, be still whilst the world is on a fast track mode.
So, I took off! And thankfully got some time to reflect. Introspection is very important to keep reminding oneself to be in the righteous path. It dawned on me “O’Lord, You have given me so much responsibility. Responsibility to produce assets for the society. Please, Almighty always guide me so I do not do wrong to anyone even by mistake.”
This thought stemmed from yesterday’s experience when a parent came to seek advice about their non performing teenage child. The child remains alone at home as both the parents are working. This child spends most of her/his time watching TV. As soon as s/he hears the sound of approaching parents s/he switches off the television out of fear of being scolded, which is a very usual case in most of the families.
I wondered how can the child study, how can s/he study or focus. When the child returns home from school, there’s no one to welcome him/her. There’s no one to give that warm smile. Clearly the feeling of boredom and loneliness will breed in and thus, watching T.V. is an easy gluey option.
I again dig into the reasons and realize that our material wants and desires have become too big to be gratified with one income.
So, what’s the option? Are we trapped in a vicious circle? If there’s a problem, there has to be a solution. In such changed family responsibility scenario, it becomes very important to teach the children to be real and realistic.
It came to me why not begin with taking their help in small family chores, be there to help them with their student life, be their companion in wrapping their books, be with them on weekends, listen to the stories from their text, may be try to read out a lesson to them or ask them out of curiosity the information pertaining to their subject. Take interest in their TV serials, appreciate their ideas, seek their opinion and talk to them as we would talk to another adult.
How we normally react to their mistake is that we scream at them or insult them and make them realize that we adults KNOW IT ALL and we try to impose our ideas on them. Instead the mistake can be handled differently. I shall explain with this personal example. Last week my child lost her ATM card. She reported the matter to me and said sorry. My reply to her was, “this is not the way we react when we lose an ATM card. Rather we call up the bank and get it blocked and apply for a new card.” Now the child realized to be more careful next time at the same time has learnt how to handle the difficult situation. Also, the child has got this bond as the trust was strengthened with my controlled temper and understanding.
The other reaction would have been that I would have shouted at my child for losing the card and she would have felt offended. It would give both of us stress and there would have been no recovery of the card. Next time my child would hide things from me because of the fear of being scolded.
So, the Choice is Yours. You have to be responsible to expect responsibility from others, you have to invest time and trust in relationship to expect it from your children, and you have to learn to give respect before expecting it from the children.
Find the missing brick to complete your Lego!
Capt. Praveen Roy | Principal | Samsara School
Edited by: Namrata Gupta